What is the ingredient that supplies us with the sense that life is beautiful? The ingredient is definitely a positive feeling. The question is: what makes us feel good? The answer is not as simple as we may think. It’s not only heaps of money, heaps of sex and heaps of power. There are people out there who have all of this and are still unhappy, perhaps because of some other aspects in their lives, such as a bad relationship, a death in the family, bad marks of their children at school, no time for the family, stress in the work environment, fear of death, jealousy, being overweight, being unhealthy, being NOT the best expert in the field, having lost an election etc.
So what makes us feel good? Raymond Aaron would simply say: Do what you love. I used to say: Love what you do. Raymond’s statement seems to be conditional as we’d be selective in what we are doing. ‘Love what you do’ is unconditional as it suggests that it is possible to love whatever we are doing. When I met Raymond Aaron, I really had to re-think, because I was conditioned to believe that it is my responsibility to love what I am doing, NOT to do what I love! Can you see the difference? Doing what we love respects our preferences and that means there will be more love, compared to just loving what we are doing, no matter what. I remember the movie ‘The Incredible Lightness of Being’ in which a qualified medical doctor was put into the position where he had to clean windows to make a living. He did this without a sense of despair, without falling into the ‘victim trap.’ He was my Hero with his accepting attitude. Then, Raymond came along and told me to do what I love most, not just anything. I have to say that this felt like an invitation to a birthday party – I was encouraged to choose the cake that I liked the most! It has already (after one month) inspired me to finally start this blog website, and to publish my ebook: ‘Happiness Unzipped – unveil yourself.’
I wrote this booklet some years ago, and when I looked into it again (after meeting Raymond) I saw that I had acknowledged preferences as valid factors in our decision making. With Raymond, this factor is crucial – in my case, preferences were, at the most, flowers at the side of the road to happiness. Raymond’s approach is very natural as it takes into consideration what we particularly like (love) doing. He empowers us to express our loves. The world is a better world when we express love by doing what we love most.
Of course, our greatest love could be to discover who we are in essence, and we would sooner or later stumble upon unconditional happiness that we ARE. Just imagine a life in which you are unconditionally happy AND on top of this you follow your ‘other’ preferences, your other loves that have to do with your DOING, not merely with your BEING. If both Being and Doing are loved, then this is the highest ‘Quality of Life’ experience. Love is the most delicious ingredient in our lives. It not only fuels our doing with positive energy, it also synthesizes Doing with Being.
